Sore and really sore

INCIDENT:
It has been two months since I moved and during that time I didn't workout once. Considering that my routine is all out of whack and I can't seem to find any stability in my schedule, I thought that I should start by working out again. While searching for a gym with heavy bags (there are none), I stumbled upon a small boxing gym. While I am not too hot on the name, I am in quite a bit of pain, which means that it's working. They say in boxing that pain is weakness leaving the body. And apparently I have a lot of weaknesses to let go.

MORAL:
I have been trying to restore aspects of my life here that were part of my daily routine back in SD. It makes the move a bit easier when I feel like there is still some consistencies and everything is not completely novel. It is very easy to fall into a funk, but by reintroducing some regularities into my life perhaps I can be less preoccupied with the way things were and focus more on what they could be.

It's snowing and it is only September

INCIDENT:
It was raining this morning... an all around deary day. I had gone to workout and I came back to eat before I did some work. But as I was leaving again this afternoon, I opened the door only to stare out into whiteness. It was snowing. And it is only September.

MORAL:
It is dang cold out here. I thought maybe I am just a big weather wuss after three years in San Diego. Well at least that is what my east coast friends tell me. But now that it is snowing I know that I am not crazy. It is cold here.

There is going to be a lot more to get use to then I consciously anticipated.

Concentration

INCIDENT:
Since I moved, I haven't been able to concentrate all too well. It's either that or I have the worst time management skills. But I hoping for the former, not that identifying the problem gets me any closer to addressing it.

MORAL:
I keep reassuring myself that my head is simply somewhere else and that is why I can't concentrate. But I'm not exactly sure that this is exclusive to my graduate school experience. It could be a self-defeating mentality that I have been reinforcing over the past couple of years. But why would I foster willing or unconsciously a self-defeating mentality? Perhaps because it gives me an excuse in case of failure. I mean if you fail before you even complete something then you can never truly be judged on that criteria. It's a bit backwards... I know... but I'm not the first to employ this tactic.

I wasn't always like this... I remember a time when I constantly exposed myself to failure. And at times, I did fail and other times I was successful beyond my own expectations. But over time I have become hesitant in many ways and I look back envious at what I once was... Can I get back there?

Last week I saw Jet Li's Fearless and the main character Huo Yuanjia imparts one liner wisdom throughout the film. But one piece of relevant insight has stuck with me.

“Competition uncovers weakness and leads to self-discovery” - Huo Yuanjia, Fearless

I have a strong fear of exposing my weaknesses. But as I have been told, graduate school is all about risk. And if I can get over myself, then perhaps I'll find success.

Hope

INCIDENT:
I have been watching a lot of movies lately since there doesn't seem to be lots of worthwhile television shows on (well at least with the strange program schedule here). Last night I watched one of my favorites... The Shawshank Redemption. There is nothing better to uplift the spirits then to watch a movie about someone overcoming injustice with determination and the strength of human will.

“Hope is a good thing, maybe the best thing, and no good thing ever dies” - Andy Dufresne, Shawshank Redemption

MORAL:
Hope is a good thing. Without it, what would we have to live for? Or in some cases to die for? When life seems so overwhelming that you don't know how to deal with it, it's hope that gets you through it all... hope for something better... hope that things could be better. We can't live without hope in our lives, and somehow that is something that is easily taken for granted. But it doesn't take much to be reminded. We just have to be open to seeing it.

Connections

INCIDENT:
I was walking across campus as classes where letting out. As a walked past a stream of people, several were talking with one another, while others were on their cell phones. And it occurred to me that people want to be connected. As the internet explodes with social networks, blogs, shared databases, wikis, etc., perhaps it is all because we inherently want to feel connected with someone even if that connection is anonymous or without obligation.

MORAL:
I certainly have the desire to be connected with others. I think it has something to do with feeling accepted or perhaps affirming yourself and your choices. There is a level of comfort and reassurance from the support or even the simple presence of others. On the grander scale of things, we are all going through the same things - joy, tragedy, loss, admiration, inspiration,.... And that is forever comforting.

Theory of Convergence

INCIDENT:
I was watching "Say Anything" the other day, which is always a good watch. And Diane Court brings up her "theory of convergence" that good things always happen with bad things. And of course they usually occur at the same time.

MORAL:
I have been thinking about this for a while now... reviewing my life and picking out possible examples and counter examples. It does seem true that with the good comes the bad. But perhaps is all a matter of being hyper aware of our personal situation. When something incredibly fortuitous occurs, we become tuned into our mental and emotional states more so than in our day-to-day. We are sensitive to our choices and our relationships. And this heightened awareness might make seemingly mundane occurrences (the ones that we would deal with without much thought), more salient in your experience. Comparing anything against something so good could never live up.

Reality TV New Low

INCIDENT:
I really miss the times when there was mostly fictional stories and game shows on TV. Gone are those days unfortunately. And as TV execs get desperate for ideas, they bet on the desperation of humanity.

TV contest to 'win' donor kidney

MORAL:
I will acknowledge that there are positive outcomes to this reality TV concept... all of which were stated by the representative of the TV network. But where is the line? Is there even a line? When does the sacred nature of humanity have precedence over the almighty dollar? It seems that a lot of things in the world are compromised over money and that is rather unfortunate for all of us.

Socially Responsible Design

INCIDENT:
What is socially responsible design? It is merely design that addresses societal needs or is it something more?

Socially Responsible Design

MORAL:
When I saw the slide show on socially responsible design I was inspired. We all could be doing more in even the most seemingly insignificant ways. But it also had me questioning what is socially responsible design. It has many facets so many things can fall into this category. It should address a basic societal need such as food, water, and shelter. This was exemplified in the things that the International Herald Tribune chose for their piece. But shouldn't it also be environmentally sound? Or universally accessible? And shouldn't the solution use regional materials and skills?